{"id":2313,"date":"2024-03-01T09:43:43","date_gmt":"2024-03-01T08:43:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/complicated.life\/blog\/?p=2313"},"modified":"2025-09-23T16:51:55","modified_gmt":"2025-09-23T14:51:55","slug":"how-to-get-the-most-out-of-therapy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/complicated.life\/blog\/how-to-get-the-most-out-of-therapy\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Get the Most Out of Therapy"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

There are many different kinds of psychotherapy: some more practical, focused on changing your thinking and behavior; some more reflective, focusing on personal insight; some more supportive, focused on emotional growth. Whatever the therapy or therapist you choose, personal change is seldom simple or easy. Effective psychotherapy is demanding, but with the right attitude you can reap immense, life-changing rewards.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Like every important endeavour, what we gain mirrors what we put in. The more time and attention we devote to personal change, the more we achieve\u2014and the more we positively influence those around us. Often the effort we make between sessions is as important as the sessions themselves. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Therapy takes time, money and focus, so it is sensible to make the most of every session and any suggestions from your therapist. Below are some suggestions about the attitudes and actions that will help you make progress and gain most from psychotherapy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Intention<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

The most important mindset in therapy is our intention. <\/strong>Most often, we come to therapy to feel better, to improve our relationships and to make better choices. Therapeutic intention is a commitment to be fully engaged in healing, changing and growing<\/em>. The stronger our intention and commitment<\/a>, the more likely we are to experience the benefits.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Therapy can be hard work. From time to time, we may feel like nothing is happening or believe we\u2019re not making progress or even going backward. This is normal and the time when intention and determination is most important. As long as we feel therapy is helpful, we need to keep renewing our commitment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Many of the rewards of therapy happen without our knowing<\/a>. Shifts of feeling, thinking and being most often change outside of our awareness. Our primary motivation may be to resolve painful issues or problematic behaviors. However as these shift, we may find our intention moves more toward personal growth and development. As long as we hold a positive intention, we will keep changing and growing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Questions to consider<\/em>: What do I really want from therapy?<\/a> How important is personal change to me? How much time, money and effort am I willing to put into therapy? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n
\n
\n
Find the right therapist<\/div>\n
Our directory contains 2500+ vetted therapists. Use our advanced search tool to find the one that fits your exact needs and preferences.<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n Find a therapist<\/a>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n\n\n\n

Stuckness and Resistance<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

We most often come to therapy because we\u2019re stuck. We\u2019ve tried all sorts of ways to resolve the issues and not been successful. It\u2019s as if a part of us is unable to put into practice what we need to do \u2014even when we know what it is. Why is this?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As human beings we constantly balance our need for stability with our need for change. When we are anxious, depressed or threatened we tend to cling to what is familiar and known. A part of us, trying to keep us safe, resists change and puts the brakes on. It is not easy to face painful, disturbing and unfamiliar aspects of our experience. However, this is essential for personal change to take place.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Deeply ingrained beliefs, traumatic experiences, losses and disappointments do not simply disappear. They leave an enduring imprint on how we think, feel and behave. Often, as these are exposed in therapy, we may feel conflicted and back away from the topic. Certain experiences are painful and we don\u2019t want to deal with them. This is part of our resistance to change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is normal to avoid uncomfortable subjects, but when this happens in therapy it can be frustrating and slow down progress. Resistance appear in different guises, so it is important to notice as it happens. Here are some examples:<\/p>\n\n\n\n