{"id":5168,"date":"2025-08-06T18:36:59","date_gmt":"2025-08-06T16:36:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/complicated.life\/blog\/?p=5168"},"modified":"2025-08-06T18:49:07","modified_gmt":"2025-08-06T16:49:07","slug":"understanding-depersonalisation-and-feelings-of-unreality-dpafu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/complicated.life\/blog\/understanding-depersonalisation-and-feelings-of-unreality-dpafu\/","title":{"rendered":"Understanding Depersonalisation and Feelings of Unreality (DPAFU)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Depersonalisation and derealisation are unsettling experiences that involve feeling detached from yourself or the world around you. These experiences are central to what is often referred to as Depersonalisation and Feelings of Unreality (DPAFU).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>What Is DPAFU?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Depersonalisation is the feeling of being detached from your own body, thoughts, emotions, or memories\u2014as if you&#8217;re observing yourself from the outside.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Derealisation is the sense that the world around you is unreal, dreamlike, or foggy.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>People experiencing DPAFU often describe their perceptions using phrases like \u201cas if I\u2019m not really here\u201d or \u201cas if everything is a dream.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Symptom Table: Understanding DPAFU<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-table is-style-stripes\"><table class=\"has-fixed-layout\"><tbody><tr><td><br><strong>Category<br><\/strong><\/td><td><br><strong>Examples<\/strong><\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Thoughts<\/td><td>\u201cI\u2019m going mad\u201d, \u201cI\u2019ve damaged my brain\u201d, \u201cThis will never end\u201d, \u201cI\u2019m not real\u201d<br><\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Emotions<\/td><td>Anxiety, sadness, hopelessness, frustration, guilt, helplessness<br><\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Physical Sensations<\/td><td>Fatigue, dizziness, numbness, tension, palpitations, shortness of breath<br><\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Cognitive Symptoms<\/td><td>Brain fog, memory problems, racing thoughts, rumination, existential worry<br><\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Behaviours<\/td><td>Avoiding crowds, staying indoors, reassurance-seeking, excessive distraction<br><\/td><\/tr><tr><td>Unhelpful Actions<\/td><td>Internet searching, self-medicating, pretending, escaping situations<br><\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n\n\n\n    <div class=\"post-cta-banner-container\" style=\"max-width:800px;margin:0 auto;\">\n      <div class=\"post-cta-banner\" style=\"display:flex;gap:64px;background:#ddf4ef;color:#363637;padding:40px;border-radius:12px;align-items:center;\">\n        <div style=\"flex:1 1 0%;min-width:0;\">\n          <div style=\"margin-bottom:16px;font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:24px;line-height:140%;letter-spacing:0%;\">Get matched<\/div>\n          <div style=\"font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:14px;line-height:22.5px;letter-spacing:0.14px;\">It&#039;s Complicated is the first matching service that balances data and human intelligence. Our team of matching specialists will help you find the right therapist.<\/div>\n        <\/div>\n        <div style=\"flex-shrink:0\">\n          <a href=\"https:\/\/complicated.life\/matching\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"\n             style=\"background:#76d8bd;color:#082820;width:100%;padding:10px 37px;border-radius:24px;text-decoration:none;font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:16px;line-height:140%;letter-spacing:0.01em;text-align:center;font-weight:500;\">Get matched<\/a>\n        <\/div>\n      <\/div>\n    <\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Why Does DPAFU Happen?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>DPAFU is often the brain\u2019s protective response to overwhelming stress, trauma, or anxiety. It\u2019s similar to the \u201cfreeze\u201d response seen in animals\u2014when escape feels impossible, the mind detaches to cope. This state temporarily shuts down emotional responses and sensory processing, which can feel helpful in the moment but distressing if it lingers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Triggers may include:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Panic attacks<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Social anxiety<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Intrusive thoughts<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Trauma<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Intense or chronic stress<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>What Happens in the Brain During DPAFU?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Neuroscience research suggests that DPAFU is linked to an imbalance in brain systems that regulate emotion, perception, and self-awareness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Here\u2019s what we know:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>1. Emotion-Suppressing System Is Overactive<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Brain imaging studies have shown that people with DPAFU often have reduced activity in emotional processing areas, such as the amygdala. This may explain the emotional numbness and sense of detachment commonly reported.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>The brain is essentially dampening emotional responses to protect the person from overwhelming anxiety or trauma.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>This can make everything feel &#8220;flat,&#8221; disconnected, or unreal.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>2. The Prefrontal Cortex Takes Over<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>The prefrontal cortex \u2014 responsible for rational thinking and control \u2014 appears to become over-engaged during episodes of DPAFU. This can suppress the brain&#8217;s emotional systems even more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>You may find yourself overanalyzing your thoughts and sensations, feeling trapped in your own head, or becoming hyperaware of your existence.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>3. Perceptual Processing Is Altered<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>The brain&#8217;s usual integration of sensory information (vision, sound, touch) may become disrupted. This helps explain symptoms like:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Visual distortions<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Feeling like you&#8217;re in a dream<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Things looking &#8220;off&#8221; or distant<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>It&#8217;s not that your senses aren&#8217;t working \u2014 it&#8217;s that your brain is processing reality differently.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>4. Stress Response and the \u2018Freeze\u2019 Reaction<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>DPAFU is considered part of the body&#8217;s defensive response to a threat, similar to &#8220;fight or flight.&#8221; But instead of fighting or running, the brain freezes, detaching from the environment as a form of psychological escape. This reaction is automatic. You&#8217;re not choosing to disconnect \u2014 your brain is trying to protect you from intense emotional pain or fear.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Misunderstanding and Misdiagnosis<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Many individuals with DPAFU are <strong>misdiagnosed with anxiety or depression<\/strong> because the symptoms can overlap. For instance, emotional numbness in DPAFU may resemble the emotional blunting found in depression, but <strong>the sense of unreality is a key difference<\/strong>. One common myth is that DPAFU is rare, but in reality, it is more common than many clinicians realize.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Is DPAFU Dangerous?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>No. DPAFU is not a sign of psychosis or schizophrenia. People with DPAFU often fear they are &#8220;going mad,&#8221; but research shows it does not lead to psychotic disorders. The experience is real, but it&#8217;s your brain&#8217;s way of trying to protect you, not harm you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>What Keeps It Going?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Sometimes, the distress caused by DPAFU itself becomes a trigger, creating a vicious cycle:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>&#8220;Why do I feel this way?&#8221;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>&#8220;What if I never feel real again?&#8221;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>&#8220;What if I&#8217;ve damaged my brain?&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>These thoughts increase anxiety and make the symptoms persist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Can You Recover from DPAFU?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Yes. Many people fully recover, and others experience symptoms only occasionally under stress. Some recover without treatment, while others benefit from therapy, such as Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), or in some cases, medication.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>How CBT Can Help<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>CBT (<a href=\"https:\/\/complicated.life\/find-help-with\/cbt-cognitive-behavioral-therapy\" rel=\"dofollow\" >Cognitive Behavioural Therapy<\/a>) helps by:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Teaching you to distinguish between thoughts, emotions, and sensations<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Challenging catastrophic thinking<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Encouraging realistic, value-based goals<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Reducing avoidance and safety behaviours<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Helping you shift attention away from your symptoms<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>A Helpful First Step: Goal Setting<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Ask yourself:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>&#8220;How would I know if I was feeling better?&#8221;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>&#8220;What would I be doing differently?&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Example:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&#8220;If I were feeling more real, I&#8217;d go out with friends twice a week.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Start small, keep goals realistic, and track your progress. Celebrate even small wins\u2014they build momentum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n    <div class=\"post-cta-banner-container\" style=\"max-width:800px;margin:0 auto;\">\n      <div class=\"post-cta-banner\" style=\"display:flex;gap:64px;background:#ddf4ef;color:#363637;padding:40px;border-radius:12px;align-items:center;\">\n        <div style=\"flex:1 1 0%;min-width:0;\">\n          <div style=\"margin-bottom:16px;font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:24px;line-height:140%;letter-spacing:0%;\">Find the right therapist<\/div>\n          <div style=\"font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:14px;line-height:22.5px;letter-spacing:0.14px;\">Our directory contains 2500+ vetted therapists. Use our advanced search tool to find the one that fits your exact needs and preferences.<\/div>\n        <\/div>\n        <div style=\"flex-shrink:0\">\n          <a href=\"https:\/\/complicated.life\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"\n             style=\"background:#76d8bd;color:#082820;width:100%;padding:10px 37px;border-radius:24px;text-decoration:none;font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:16px;line-height:140%;letter-spacing:0.01em;text-align:center;font-weight:500;\">Find a therapist<\/a>\n        <\/div>\n      <\/div>\n    <\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Practical Exercises for Managing DPAFU<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>While understanding and accepting DPAFU is a crucial first step, taking small, consistent actions can help retrain the brain and reduce symptoms over time. Below are some exercises and strategies that many people have found helpful in their recovery journey.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>1. Grounding Techniques<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>These exercises help bring your attention back to the present and reduce feelings of detachment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>5-4-3-2-1 Technique<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Name:\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>5 things you can see<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>4 things you can touch<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>3 things you can hear<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>2 things you can smell<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>1 thing you can taste<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Body Awareness<\/strong><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Focus on the feeling of your feet on the ground, your back against a chair, or the texture of an object in your hand. Describe it in detail.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>2. Mindfulness and Acceptance<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Learning to observe your experience without judgment helps reduce the fear and resistance that often maintain DPAFU.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Practice <strong>mindful breathing<\/strong> for 5\u201310 minutes a day. Focus on the air entering and leaving your body.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Try apps like Headspace or Calm for guided mindfulness.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Accept the sensation without trying to fight it: \u201cThis feels strange, but it\u2019s not dangerous.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>3. Behavioral Activation<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Doing meaningful or enjoyable activities\u2014even when you don\u2019t feel like it\u2014can help reconnect you with reality and improve your mood.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Make a <strong>daily routine<\/strong> that includes regular meals, light exercise, and social contact.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Choose small activities that align with your values (e.g., talking to a friend, doing a hobby).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Track your mood before and after to notice changes.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>4. Journaling and Cognitive Restructuring<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Write down your thoughts and examine them for distortions or assumptions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Example: \u201cI\u2019ll never get better\u201d \u2192 Challenge this by listing evidence for and against.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Use CBT-style worksheets or apps like Thought Diary.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>5. Attention Training<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Since DPAFU often involves inward, obsessive focus, try actively shifting attention outward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Describe what you see in your environment in detail.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Try engaging in tasks that demand external focus, such as drawing from observation, cooking, or organizing something physical.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>6. Exercise and Movement<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Physical activity can regulate stress hormones and reconnect you to your body.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Start with gentle movement (e.g., walking, stretching, yoga).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Focus on the sensations in your body while moving\u2014this enhances grounding.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>7. Limit Reassurance and Internet Searches<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Constant reassurance-seeking and Googling can maintain anxiety.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Set limits: e.g., \u201cI will only search for information once a week, for 10 minutes.\u201d<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Practice sitting with uncertainty rather than trying to eliminate it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Recovery from DPAFU is possible. It may take time, and progress is not always linear, but many people regain a strong sense of connection to themselves and the world. Whether through self-help, therapy, or a combination of both, the key lies in understanding the experience, accepting it, and gradually re-engaging with life.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n    <div class=\"post-cta-banner-container\" style=\"max-width:800px;margin:0 auto;\">\n      <div class=\"post-cta-banner\" style=\"display:flex;gap:64px;background:#ddf4ef;color:#363637;padding:40px;border-radius:12px;align-items:center;\">\n        <div style=\"flex:1 1 0%;min-width:0;\">\n          <div style=\"margin-bottom:16px;font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:24px;line-height:140%;letter-spacing:0%;\">Get matched<\/div>\n          <div style=\"font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:14px;line-height:22.5px;letter-spacing:0.14px;\">It&#039;s Complicated is the first matching service that balances data and human intelligence. Our team of matching specialists will help you find the right therapist.<\/div>\n        <\/div>\n        <div style=\"flex-shrink:0\">\n          <a href=\"https:\/\/complicated.life\/matching\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"\n             style=\"background:#76d8bd;color:#082820;width:100%;padding:10px 37px;border-radius:24px;text-decoration:none;font-family:'General Sans Variable',Inter,Arial;font-size:16px;line-height:140%;letter-spacing:0.01em;text-align:center;font-weight:500;\">Get matched<\/a>\n        <\/div>\n      <\/div>\n    <\/div>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Recommended Reading<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>For those who wish to learn more about depersonalisation and feelings of unreality, a highly recommended resource is <em>Overcoming Depersonalisation and Feelings of Unreality, 2nd Edition: A Self-Help Guide Using Cognitive Behavioural Techniques<\/em> by Anthony David, Emma Lawrence, Dawn Baker, and Elaine Hunter. Part of the well-regarded <em>Overcoming<\/em> series, this book is written in accessible language and designed for the general public. It provides practical tools based on Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) that can support both individuals experiencing DPAFU and the professionals who work with them. This book was also used as a key reference in the development of this article.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"itscomplicated-calendar\" style=\"width:100%;min-width:310px;max-width:1023px\"><\/div> <script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"https:\/\/complicated.life\/embed\/calendar\/psychologist-ana-ablas\/p.js\"><\/script>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Depersonalisation and derealisation are unsettling experiences that involve feeling detached from yourself or the world around you. These&hellip;\n","protected":false},"author":98,"featured_media":5170,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[22,639],"tags":[340,362,342,341],"class_list":{"0":"post-5168","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-for-all","8":"category-mental-health-and-wellbeing","9":"tag-anxiety","10":"tag-cognitive-behavioural-therapy-cbt","11":"tag-stress","12":"tag-trauma"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Understanding Depersonalisation and Feelings of Unreality (DPAFU) - It&#039;s Complicated<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Explore the causes, symptoms, and neuroscience behind depersonalisation and feelings of unreality (DPAFU). 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