It's Complicated

Berfin Alyesil

(she/her)

Counsellor

Verified by It's Complicated
Available for new clients
I am a psychosexologist with a background in clinical psychodynamic psychology. I help people get in touch with their playful and creative selves in their relationships with both themselves and others.

I specialise in:

At a glance
Rome, ItalyAvailable in-person and online
Last active
Offers free 20 minute introductory callThis provider offers a free introductory call
Illustration of a smiling sun peeking over a cloud, symbolizing warmth and positivity for connecting with the therapist.
Usually responds within 4 hours

About me

Hi everyone! I am a clinical psychosexologist, researcher and artist. My work sits at the intersection of psychology, sexuality and artistic practice. I hold a double bachelor's degree in Psychology and Cinema and I am currently completing my Master's in Applied Dynamic and Clinical Psychology at Sapienza University of Roma, specializing in Clinical Psychosexology. Alongside my clinical training I also work as a tutor for professionals getting their clinical sexology formation at the Clinical Sexology Institute of Rome. And I remain an active participant of the field of sexology, engaged in academic and cultural research through publications and congresses on sexuality, identity and contemporary intimacy. Rather than approaching sexuality primarily as a set of symptoms to be corrected, I love to approach it as a creative, relational and symbolic force of the psyche that helps us thrive in our lives. I see sexuality as imagination, embodiment and meaning, not as mechanical performance or purely biological function. Desire is not just something that "works" or "doesn't work", it carries diverse pieces of us, such as our history, fantasy, fear, culture, memory and identity, and I am very careful about integrating these into my work. My practice is a space where, together, we can examine different layers with both rigor and curiosity. I am well aware that our sexual selves are often constrained by customs and laws. I recognize the inherently political dimension of sexual well-being and I approach my work with a clear stance in its commitment to autonomy and dignity. I support individuals navigating internalized shame and guilt. I work comfortably with sexual and relationship diversity, including LGBTQ+ identities, non-monogamous relationships and kink communities. I strive to create a practice where diverse erotic expressions can be explored without pathologization. Clients typically come to me for various reasons including: * Problems with sexual pleasure and orgasm * Low desire or mismatched desire * Performance anxiety * Sexual shame * Exploration of sexual orientation or gender identity * Relationship breakdowns * Exploring kink, BDSM and fetishes * Compulsive sexual behaviours However, therapy often evolves beyond the initial complaint since sexual topics are rarely isolated because our sexualities are intricately connected with our attachment history, family narratives and cultural identities. Most importantly, I believe sexuality is one of the most direct paths to get in touch with the deeper layers of the psyche and this is exactly why I love the work I do. I often come back to the idea that "sex is how adults play", therefore one of the distinguishing elements of my work is the integration of our playful and creative selves. When play disappears, intimacy becomes performance which may lead to a sense of obligation or anxiety. As far as my experience shows me, reintroducing conscious play into our lives, within safe and therapeutic boundaries, allows us to reconnect with our curiosity and agency in all the different parts of our lives. This interest in play also extends beyond the therapy room. I am the co-creator of Unveil, a card game designed to facilitate meaningful conversations and experiences around intimacy, desire, identity and human connection. The project emerged from my belief that play, curiosity and self-discovery are deeply intertwined. I am also deeply informed by my experience as an immigrant and believe in my ability to create culturally sensitive and inclusive spaces for all. I am attentive to how culture, migration, language or social norms shape our identities and desire dynamics. I know from first hand experience how transformative immigration can be. Therefore, I support people in building a new life for themselves and their loved ones, tackling issues such as integration, survivor's guilt, intercultural relationships, getting rooted and feelings of derootedness. Migration often reshapes intimacy with both ourselves and the others and I hold space for those transitions with nuance. Beyond clinical work, I also facilitate workshops on diverse topics such as erotic communication, desire, sex positive sexual education or self-expressive practices. I often describe my work as engaging with libido in multiple forms, both its creative and sexual manifestations. My artistic practice allows me to engage with libidinal energy as a force of imagination and transformation while my clinical work lets me translate this understanding into a grounded, ethical and healing space for the others. I offer a free introductory session if you are interested in meeting and seeing if working together would be a good fit for both of us. I hope you have a wonderful day!

I speak:

TurkishEnglish

Connect with me:

Location:

Media Gallery

Approach

Treatment Approaches
GSRD (Gender, Sexuality & Relationship Diversity) TherapyRecommended for those seeking affirmative support and guidance while navigating the complexities of identity, sexuality, and relationships.
Psychodynamic therapyRecommended for those looking to explore their emotions deeply and understand how past experiences shape their present life.
My approach is integrative, depth oriented and relational. I work from the understanding that sexuality is not an isolated function but an expression of the whole psyche, shaped by attachment history, culture, family narratives, embodiment and unconscious dynamics. For this reason, I do not focus solely on symptom reduction, rather, I love to work on meaning, structure and long-term integration. I draw primarily from psychodynamic and clinical sexology frameworks, which are my main trainings, however, I also hold a holistic view of sexuality. I integrate depth psychology, somatic awareness and when appropriate, expressive techniques. This allows us to explore both the psychological roots of a difficulty and its present-day relational expression. When practical tools such as spontaneous narrative building, creative expression, roleplaying or somatic exercises may be useful I like to integrate them carefully within the broader reflective process. I work collaboratively but not passively, clinical practice for me is an active process. I believe every therapeutic alliance is unique and shaped by both me and the client, building together to find the best fit.

Experience

Istituto Sessuologia Clinica (Clinical Sexology Institute of Rome) Tutor of Clinical Sexology TAPV (Turkish Family Planning and Health Foundation) Project Specialist Cisu (Sexual and Reproductive Health Rights Platform) Project Specialist SPoD (Gender and Sexuality Research Foundation) Counselor for sexually diverse individuals

Education

Masters: - Applied Dynamic and Clinical Psychology Sapienza University of Rome Specialization: - Clinical Psychosexology Sapienza University of Rome Bachelor's Degree: - Psychology Istanbul Bilgi University - Cinema Istanbul Bilgi University Clinical Trainings: - Abortion Doula - Psychodrama first module - Psychoanalytic Dream Analysis - Gender and Sexual Orientation Focused Counseling Training - Female Sexual Drive and Sexuality - Developmental psychology - Psychological First Aid

Services

Intro Call

Free 20 min Online & In-person

Individual Session

€55 45 min Online & In-person

Couples Session

€80 45 min Online & In-person

Group Session

€30 2 hr Online & In-person

Individual Session

Sliding scale
€40 45 min Online & In-person

Insurances

Private Pay
At a glance
Rome, ItalyAvailable in-person and online
Last active
Offers free 20 minute introductory callThis provider offers a free introductory call
Illustration of a smiling sun peeking over a cloud, symbolizing warmth and positivity for connecting with the therapist.
Usually responds within 4 hours

Explore more

My publications

Next available: Jun 15