How It's Complicated works
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Learn more about social anxiety
Social anxiety is an intense, persistent fear of being judged, embarrassed, or scrutinised in social situations. Also known as social phobia, it is recognised as an anxiety disorder in the DSM-5 and ICD-11, and it goes well beyond ordinary shyness or nerves. People with social anxiety often anticipate social situations with dread, endure them with significant distress, or avoid them altogether, even when they know the fear is out of proportion. It can centre on specific situations, such as public speaking, or apply broadly to almost any interaction. Social anxiety is common and very treatable, though many people live with it for years before seeking help.
Social anxiety affects thoughts, feelings, and the body, and it usually revolves around a fear of negative judgement. You might recognise:
- Intense fear or dread before social situations, sometimes days in advance
- Worrying at length about being judged, embarrassing yourself, or being watched
- Avoiding social situations, or enduring them with real distress
- Physical signs such as blushing, sweating, trembling, a racing heart, or nausea
- Replaying interactions afterwards, focusing on what you think you got wrong
- Difficulty with everyday tasks like phone calls, eating in public, or speaking up
- Fear that others will notice your anxiety, which can make it feel worse
Social anxiety responds very well to therapy, and several approaches have strong evidence. The right fit depends on how it shows up for you.
- CBT: Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is the most established treatment for social anxiety, helping you challenge fearful predictions about judgement and gradually face avoided situations.
- ACT: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy helps you act on what matters to you even while anxiety is present, rather than waiting for the fear to disappear first.
- Group therapy offers a supportive setting to practise social interaction itself, which makes it particularly well suited to social anxiety.
- Schema therapy addresses the deeper beliefs about yourself and others that can drive long-standing social anxiety.
- CFT: Compassion-Focused Therapy works on the harsh self-judgement and fear of criticism that often sit at the core of social anxiety.
It's Complicated is a therapist-founded mental health platform connecting clients with verified practitioners across Europe and globally, in over 60 languages. We work with over 2,500 vetted therapists, with in-person availability in Berlin, Amsterdam, Barcelona, Lisbon, Vienna, and other major cities, alongside online sessions worldwide. It's Complicated is free to use, and you pay your chosen therapist directly at rates they set.
Reaching out for help with social anxiety can feel like the hardest possible ask, because contacting a stranger is exactly the kind of situation that triggers it. Our matching service is built to remove that friction. You complete a short survey, our psychologists combine data-driven insights with human judgement to identify the right therapists for your situation, and you choose from a shortlist of strong candidates. Online sessions mean you can begin from somewhere you feel safe. You can also browse our directory directly if you'd prefer to choose yourself.
Get matched with a therapist who specialises in social anxiety, or browse the directory to choose yourself.
